A broken telescope
gazes sightless into
the redundant sky,
rotting timbers creak
amid half removed ironwork,
graffiti of the departed
scrawled on torn-postered
rusting balustrades;
only half remembering
the very long ago of
those places and their times,
inexhaustable
porcelained mementoes,
candyflossed,boat-tripped,seagull clarioned
abandoned in envious oblivion,
sweeping
sweeping toward
a far horizon
of never
never going back,
leaving one last footprint
to the inexorable tide.
The concept of sea is a marvel that engulfs life fully,wholly and deeply.This poem is a tribute to that -a timeless spray of water to the parched earth.
Thank you for your perceptive observations.
Proust and Eliot echoes can be heard in the sea-tossed background marvellously re-made, re-presented, re-created by the gifted Louis. The auditory effects linger on: The sea waves and the seagulls are fused in a powerful poem that tries to retrieve moments past. The desire to resist oblivion through pencilled graffiti and poetic activity are identical attempts at capturing bubbles from the well of memory. A great work, Louis.
Many thanks for your generous and insightful comments.
‘the very long ago’ – what a cracking phrase. Seems, as the years sweep by, that changes from ‘yesterdays’ move on at an ever increasing pace and ‘long ago’ is no longer adequate.
‘candyflossed,boat-tripped,seagull clarioned’ almost hear Dylan Thomas speaking !
Thank you Keith, and well spotted re:Dylan,Thomas this time and not the fictional children’s character,I do enjoy plagiarising,sorry,adapting his style of alliteration , (if that is indeed the correct description).
Comment added to “Seaside Postcard” on The Writers’ Circle
Hide Details
FROM:
The Writers’ Circle
TO:
louis kasatkin
Message flagged Sunday, 2 September 2012, 7:16
A new comment has been added to your article or an article you are subscribed to on The Writers’ Circle website.
The article:
Seaside Postcard by louis kasatkin
The comment (by kelly bella):
Ah-ha, this is not one of my favorites. Then again your worst poem is heads and shoulders above ours. But at least now you know I won’t jump up and down at everything you write. It had moments and had you sheared off some of the descriptives like “inexorable” “redundant” “torn-postered” “abandoned in envious oblivion” I would have been deep inside this poem. There I criticized the master–now I’m wondering if lightning is going to strike me! I reckon you’ll let it slide. A talent like yours can afford to be generous.
A great write. Enjoyed reading it.
nice..refreshing and much enjoyed:)