Alternate Version

The Spanish speaking tabby cat

is reciting poetry at the door,

whilst mice in the cellar are

rehearsing ” The Barber of Seville “;

Our memories are scattered

and refuse to come home when called,

crimson has been voted most popular colour

by Old dutch masters who no longer paint;

We avoid mentioning the room in which

the elephant sits for fear of embarrassing

those who are about to leave;

All of our spelling mistakes have been corrected

by those who cannot read,

and for the sake of unity with dunces

we’ve hidden all our wisdom

in a box in the garden shed;

A giant broom of ignorance is sweeping

away the detritus we called learning

leaving the kitchen floor spotless once again.

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