The Lingering Pain Of Silence

speak not, for my tongue is numbed with lips that are closed
my words in my throat, holding back a breath indisposed
thoughts pondering, finding lost words to shout my pains
only the dust of time from the past left a choice without refrains
whirling around in my own space that holds me still
my body hollowed with so much emptiness, i need to fill
i gather the pieces of my shattered moments to mold back again
wishing to burn within the silence of my lingering pain
like the ocean in its deepest, my soul breathes out a distant sigh
from the freezing cold waters, teardrops mounted upon the sky.
unto the shoulder of the dark clouds, i rendered my burden
when it rains once again, let me drench from tears of heaven.
the shivering cold i feel brings me back the memories,
i have you beside me, warmed by your arms, to tell my stories
i open my lips for a little smile, coz it’s you that i see
awakened from a wink of my eyes, there was no one but me
how i wish to be seeing you from the places that surround me
where we giggle and laugh, fumble and feeble with glee
it is always you, the soul of my soul my mysterious glory
let me be a part of you though we travel in all of life’s misery
with you is the joy i behold without regrets and without compare
all the truth and lies in this earthen imperfection i dare
slumber and drunk with my brokenness i forebear falling
found myself lost and alone, it is you that i am calling
keep filling myself with nothing, but only the thoughts of you
broken pieces to keep me whole again from that shattered hue
i remained in the silence of my lingering pain and speak no more
till i hold you back to stay within my embrace forevermore
hear me, dear, the sigh of my endearing whispers of pain
tears never stop like the rains tapping my windowpane
burying me deep away from my own self and my own sanity
far far away that brings me out and beyond eternity
lost …lost into the darkened deep, till nothin of me can be found
no footprints nor my ashes from every traces of the ground
i am nothing now but the wind touching your skin
touching your lips, with that alluring smile of a silly grin

acrylic on canvas by suzette portes san jose

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About suzette portes san jose

Suzette Portes SanJosee is a Filipina, 62 yrs old, a widow and a mother of 5 daughters and a son. She is Bachelor of Science in Commerce from the University of San Carlos. She has been through her studies from being a University Scholar. She is not a literary achiever like other poets but born with her passion for writing and living in her arts. She started to write online, the year 2013. Her poetry brings about her life's journey in her pains, frustrations, betrayals and somehow a joy that found its way to her existence. An international contributor of poetry and arts... have contributed to 10 books since 2015 and 2017... and a book cover artist of 2 books for a moment. Done every poem with a painting for visuals. Doing her painting on canvas with acrylic and oil paint. also using acid-free paper for watercolor and poster paints. She also an admin to poetry groups on FB... Heart and Soul poetry USA, The Challenge USA, Feelings International Artist USA, Mohinderdeep Grewal Poetry corner Canada, Hiraya International Philippines. At her age, she had found the fulfillment of her dreams and passion and would rather choose to venture for more success in arts and literary works. She wants to convey these words, " INSPIRE BEFORE YOU EXPIRE"

5 thoughts on “The Lingering Pain Of Silence

    1. suzette portes san jose Post author

      thank you Sir Louis for such deep understanding like reading what i hold within…


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