Grief

Moments never repeat themselves exactly
And yet, life presents us with some singularly unique moments
That stay with us forever…

Grief –
It doesn’t have a straight line, or a road from past to present to the future
But it does take you on a time travel
In the most unexpected of moments, like a bolt from the blue
It hits you, pushing you through the labyrinths of Time
You hurtle past the curves and bends, struggling to find an escape route
And yet, you bleed – profusely – at every bend you stumble
Because you are blindfolded by your pain
The film plays right before your eyes
And in a fraction of a second, past becomes present
It may have happened years ago,
And yet the pain is ripe – just like a razor sharp slit in your wrist
Perhaps some corner of your mind knows that it’s in the past
And yet you are acutely aware of everything that’s playing before your eyes
And you feel yourself in the picture
Standing right there, in that singularly unique moment
You feel the helplessness, the panic, the searing ache in your heart
Even though it may have been years in the past
Time’s opera defies the norms of the present
And you watch – a mute spectator – as much as a victim
As grief plays tango with the darkest of your memories…

***

The clock ticks with an endless monotony
The white silence screaming inside your head
You lie in bed, breathing heavily
Time is tick ticking away
And you are just as helpless as ever
Watching your dreams disappear and die
In the present you zoom right through into the future
And all you see is bleak darkness
Nothing makes sense anymore
And nothing matters either
How feel the ache, and those unanswered questions still hang in mid air
Insomniac dreams aren’t really dreams,
You tell yourself
And yet you know, nothing awaits you in the future

***

You have lived juggling the past, present and future
And yet you know, on the cartographic scape of time
Grief meanders across all the three realms
It’s singular in its identity and that singularly unique moment
That moment when you lost a part of yourself, forever
You are bound to keep that with you, hold it close to your heart
For it keeps coming back to you and will continue to do so
Entwining past, present and future…
“Forever”

Copyright Inara (Samrudhi Dash)

3 thoughts on “Grief

  1. Amita Paul

    The poem makes a strong impact to begin with but then begins to meander It would be more effective if kept compact

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *