Author Archives: Bilquis Fatima

Don’t You Wish

Don’t You Wish

Don’t you wish
You had hugged them more,
Embraced them once more,
Loved more , cared some more,
Conversed more , listened more.
Visited them more often,
Clasped feeble hands more often
Dined together more often ,
Walked together more often
Spent time together more,
Rubbed each other’s back more often
Planted kisses on loved one’s cheeks
And whispered more often,
“I love you deep.”

Flipped pages of books together
Cuddled with loved ones more ,
Sorted out medicines for the old
And placed them on their tongues
Held glasses of water for trembling ones
Showered your endearments more often,
Applied emollient on cut skins,
Of those who stood with you when hope ran thin.
Don’t you wish
You had blurted out more often,
Your heart’s feelings profound ,
Of how grateful you feel,
Towards each and everyone around,
Blessing you with love abound.
For even a fraction of this if you did achieve,
You wouldn’t be hurting so much
With regret and grief.

Now the times have changed for a while
But you can still dial
And whisper, you love them all the more.
Don’t you wish normalcy soon returns
And with all the wisdom learned,
You do all that you should have done ,
But left them undone.
A smile, a hug, a caress , a cuddle,
A pat, a whisper, a gentle touch,
And last but not much,
A thankful bow to the one and the only ,
Who blessed you with so much.

Trust

It will take me aeons,
To again grow and bloom
For so ruthlessly you plundered my plume,
That what remains is a hovering gloom.
And may be I just never bloom.

I make home in hearts
Always with a cautious start
Then carefree I dwell
Attached to all sentience
Verily believing all that is portrayed.

But now I am a broken thread ,
Lying in shreds
Next to the dead,
Of a rosary shattered
Its beads all scattered.

I was perforated when bullet pierced chests
I was burnt in houses set ablaze
I was desecrated in the holy place vandalized,
I was smouldered in the books set aflame
I drowned in the shrieks for help.

And now a lifetime is less
For me to incarnate
And thread the beads once again
To find a home in loving hearts,
Or wait for a miracle to change fate.

I Build Walls .

I build walls where ever I go
I build walls to let go
To be light and free,
Free of emotions that weigh you down
Emotions that cause tears to roll down
Whenever attached to anyone I get
And not willing to leave them yet,
For reasons good or bad,
Emotions when reach the zenith
And tangle like climbers within,
Last snaps with them I take
And paste them to my album,
Which I bury in a huge treasure trunk,
That opens only to swallow junks.
Shutting it close I return to my chores
Only to come back with another set of photos.
Forbidding myself to be shackled by commotions,
I build walls around my emotions.

Love Of Olden Days.

Can love like days of yore still be found
When besotted hearts happily forsook their crown.
And endearing epistles written in fresh blood
With split fingers that never hurt,
Turned into beads of revered rosary
Emitting volumes of pure poetry.

When dauntless lovers travelled across hills and terrains
To meet their love broke all constraints.
And for one and only they turned grey
But never their love would they betray
For love was so profound and deep
Seeing their devotions even God would weep.

Progress

Like the clouds you drifted
away to distant land
In pursuit of your dreams.
You endeavoured to gain
A life of affluence,
Leaving hearts parched behind.

The glitter of strange land,
New places and faces
Captivate , mesmerize,
Lifestyles entice , provides,
Ostentation presides.
Success is misconstrued.

Engrossed deep in your strive
To ameliorate life
Success prioritized,
Bonding gets compromised .
Your visits become few
swapped by excuses new.

Feelings wane away as,
You endlessly explore
While far back at home,
Vacant eyes search for the
Happiness and warmth,
that money can’t purchase.

Your loving grandma
turns stoic, keeps counting days,
Ears hung to phone bell ,
eagerly for your news awaits.
Living for all these years
Vicariously through you.

The doors await your steps,
festivities miss you.
While  the loved ones remain
impatient   for you                                                                                                                                       to  restore  their lost smiles.
And make this house a home once more.

A mendicant ‘s perspective

..

Why do you ignore
An empty hand that implores?
For a few crumbs of bread
Or some pennies instead.

A strong resentment in you I feel,
Reflecting repulsion in the glance you steal
Ready with hollow advices to preach ,
Declaring begging a perpetrating disease.

No comforts you offer nor a penny you spare.
Comparing mendicants to criminals is not fair.
For if you are deprived of endearment
Don’t blindly give your judgment.

Addicted to wasting meals ,
How would you know our ordeal
For pangs of hunger buffeting thus,
Seems a relentless curse on us.

Forced to live on others mercy, dying each day of ignominy.
This plight of us brought about by your tyranny.
Your malpractices and selfish schemes, havoc wreaks.
Unfathomable greed makes humanity weep.

An heir’s plight.

Stumbling over the stairs
File slipping from my hand
My shawl sweeping the office floor
As I stooped to collect the scattered papers
placing them in the file haphazardly
amidst an air of melancholy.
The bold letters of my mom’s name
on the file cover
smiled, exuding a certain warmth, enough to break the barrier
for tears waiting to gush out .
and for a moment oblivious to the surrounding

I let it flow
As they trickled on the file cover,
paying their homage .

A strong desire rose within me ,

if only ,I was endowed
with the power to bargain with God,
The legacy and all that I own,
Or would own in my life time,
I would relinquish to get you back next to me,
to hold your warm hands once more,
instead of this cold file,
that bestows me your legacy
What good is this marble and granite,
bereft of your angelic smile,

That made my world shine.

Straight from the heart.

I don’t know what my heart wants,

Vast expanse of greenery or cozy company,

The freedom of the sky,

Or the confinement of a heart.

I really don’t understand

This crazy heart of mine.

Longings take a sinuous turn

Sometimes leaping towards the sky

Sometimes steeping towards the sea.

Eager to abandon all to reach unattainable heights ,

or sink in the enigmatic depths

Of why, why not , when and who ?

The past seems a long dream

All attachments, mere myths.

And the future a mirage,

A fooling charade.

And it is the present that baffles ,

Unable to decide, why this restlessness in me ?

I wish, suddenly a beam of light,

Would shine from somewhere, somehow

And enlighten me of the desire of the heart.

Or is it that the heart has stopped desiring.

So the world looks so insipid, so strange !

The Mirage called Love.

Under the silver twilight love walks away
The silhouette growing smaller
Disappearing in the oblivion.
Leaving behind a storm of darkness.
Giving a feel of a hundred arrows
piercing at once
That’s when the heart looks inside the void
And wonders what had created the chaos
What churned the life for a lifetime
Pursuing bliss ephemeral,
Is love for real or just an illusion
Or mere delusion
Or fancy of a youthful heart
Or a myth of folklores.
For if love was real
Then why it proves a travesty
Doesn’t love make you smile,
When you first feel the vibe,
Exuding an aura of bliss and joy
Then why does it fade away ?
if altruistic emotions are its creations
why does it wax and wane
and hides behind shades
turning into a stranger ,
to the one whose space it occupied .
the weight of which felt ,
only once gone ,
Carving deep impressions,
leaving a heart undulated for life.

The Drink called Life

The Drink called Life.

Drink the drink of life
For nothing more refreshing than the breath of life.
So all parched lips get together ,
drink the intoxication freely available,
To witness flowers bloom in deserts
And stars glitter in eyes.

Let it touch thy lips without regret
Bringing thee triumph over death.
And when you shall finally cease to drink
Death shall wrap you in its wing.
So drink and rejoice,
at the intricacies of life.