A Victim of Oneself

being a victim of oneself is forever;
…we wish to live a life of our own
…choose the way we wanted them
…spend our days in most ways we love

believing that everything we do
makes what is best for us….

things will never make a change
…not unless we desire the same
…in thoughts and visions to believe
…we consciously perceive

nothing in mind anticipates
everything that should be accounted for…

until it is too late to come back
…where things shouldn’t be what it is now
…when you can no longer say sorry
…all that there was, is regret

what had been done is done
and there is no way out…

you are the victim that suffers
…failed to achieve the best desire to live
…thrown away the chance of a lifetime
…judged in ways that life turn out to be

all we can have is a grip
of anything left from what is wasted

a victim of oneself
…unmasked for being who you are
…an emblem of soul imparted
…into ashes a life to heed on

would it be a part of history
to attain real life and exist without regrets

the failure to linger on…forever

in acrylic painting by suzette portes san jose

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About suzette portes san jose

ABOUT THE AUTHOR SUZETTE PORTES SAN JOSE She was born and raised in Cebu City, spent her elementary years at Stella Maris School, Franciscan Missionary Sisters at Mabolo, Banilad, Cebu City and her high school years at the University of San Carlos Girls High School, Holy Spirit Sisters. She went to college at the University of San Carlos, SVD Priest in Cebu City, Philippines. She is a University half scholar from high school to college. She was born with a passion for writing and living in her art forms. She started writing online in 2013. She now has joined 18 book anthologies from 2015 to 2019. Each of her poems is written with her painting as visuals and is now appearing internationally, namely in the United States, Canada, United Kingdom, India, and the Philippines. She is also a recipient of multiple awards for her ARTworks and Literary works. She was awarded Poet of the Year in 2017 by one of the prestigious poetry site Destiny Poets International Community of Poets UK. Also, a regular contributor to GloMag a monthly issued magazine in India. She has also published her 2 narrative poem Chapbook book "As The Wind Blows" and "Whispering Silence" in the 10 part series. She has also done her first-authored book "The Dawning" along with other books Isle of Words and Colors Vol 1 "Footprints from Every Waks of Life", Isles of Words and Colors Vol. 2 "Journey to the New Horizon" and Kirky’s Adventure Vol.1. Now coming up with Isle of Words and Colors Vol. 3 "At The Rainbows End" and her 2nd book "Whisperings". It has always been her dream to leave her legacy as a fulfilled artist and for her next generation to follow her footsteps. A dream comes true. Thank you, Kirk Dominic (granddaughter) Wilyam Gabriel SJ Reyes (grandson) and Angelito Portes San Jose (only son) for dreams that came to reality.

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